Goffman and His "Performance Funeral"

Goffman's book focuses on the idea that life is a performance and that everyone of us is a performer. His example of of a funeral as a performance is very odd and disturbing on a personal level, but yet at the same time the idea that most social rituals such as a funerals are performances makes sense.

My first reaction to the ideas that a funeral is a performance was horror. How could Goffman be suggesting that something so solemn and personal as a funeral is a performance? Funerals are so embedded into the grieving process that it would seem as if Goffman is able to be a completely objective and detached observer. Goffman would almost have to be a purely analytical person to not consider the emotions that people experience during a funeral. Personally, I have been four funerals in the past two years. I found each of them very painful and not at all to be a performance. The tears I saw were genuine and those who comforted the family were sincere. I remember how I watched two mothers in my high school bury their daughters and my classmates. When I think about my experiences with funerals, I wonder if Goffman had really experienced a funeral first hand, and not just as an objective observer. My first reaction to Goffman's funeral example was that is was disrespectful and took away some of the solemnity of the occasion.

But when I began to think about Goffman's example of the funeral in a critical manner, I realized that Goffman actually had a point about social rituals that are embedded into our society. Goffman's examples throughout the introduction and first two chapters are all disrespectful, but they are reveling about how society and people act an present themselves. Goffman argues that social rituals are performance. He is right. How many social functions have I been to where the purpose is to put on a show. All the political cocktail parties, photo ops, and even funerals are performances meant to give a specific impression. This is exactly what Goffman is talking about. Over and over again he discusses how everyone is a performer and part of a performance. I have always wondered why funerals have been made into such big social events. I understand that someone has died, but does the family really need to be with so many people to grieve. At the same funerals I have attended when I had lost classmates, I have seen mothers that all they want to do is be left alone. Why does society insist on these huge showings of grief when it may not even be helpful? Goffman reveals something very interesting about human behavior; he understands that humans are showy and loud often for no important reason and often for the very wrong reason.

Overall, I thought Goffman's example of the funeral was disrespectful and yet enlightening. It is interesting to examine how many of our common social ritual are just that, truly rituals.